Foie Gras, rivers of Champagne, organ music of blameless pedigree and international soloists beyond compare.
None of these will be in evidence at the President's Evening at St Paul's Armitage Bridge, in February.
There will however be a number of duets, performances involving other instruments and one or two unorthodox arrangements. And some of our younger members, including a welcome contingent from the university, will be demonstrating their skills.
Afterwards, there will be Armitage Bridge's answer to haute cuisine: pork pies and authentic mushy peas.
President Robert Cockroft says: "As a rusty and reluctant performer I thought my most creative contribution to the evening would be to stir the peas.
"But I hope a good number of people will come along to hear some unusual repertoire and to meet and listen to some of our new members.
"This is an informal evening with the emphasis equally on the musical and the social."
Date: Friday February 28th, 7.30pm